A TALE OF LOVE
How much do you love someone ! You realise it when you are away from them. I was in love with this very handsome young man in my neighborhood. He was from a remote village and had relocated for work to Mumbai. Coincidentally, he came to stay with his sister in my neighborhood. There was instant liking from both our sides when we were first introduced. Soon we became good friends.
In the beginning I did not realise that I was in love. I was in constant denial of my feelings for him. I wasn’t sure if he loved me or even liked me though at times, I found him looking at me and smiling. I was too young to take a call on my own life and I wasn’t sure how my family would react. So I was disillusioned and afraid of my own feelings. I decided to stop having access to him or talking to him.
The first day I saw him, I just walked off without looking at him. I cried the whole way not being able to understand why I was doing it to myself and him. I was so much in love with him. This continued for a few days until one day he stopped me and asked me what was wrong. I had no words to tell him what was going on in my mind nor could I look into his eyes and show him my pain. I told him that I am going through some personal problems and wish to stay on my own. He nodded and walked off.
I watched his back with teary eyes which were flooded with tears and flew like a gushing river. I realised that We were meant for each other. But reality was different. I couldn’t fight my own family for him but neither could I put the person I loved in pain. At that point I realised that he was in love with me too and suffering as much and I should not be doing what I was doing. I had to make up my mind how we go about it and not spoil our life through any kind of deceit.
After a few days I met him and told him how I felt. I didn’t want him to suffer because I loved him dearly. I was also suffering and I didn’t know what I should do. We both were still raw in our relationship so I told him that I want to concentrate on my studies whilst he should concentrate on his work and see how life enfolds. He also felt similarly and told me that I should study well.
At that point it was a mutual decision to be on our own but we soon realised we couldn’t stay away from each other. Every thought had him always around. He too kept looking out for me as much as me and secretly we belonged to each other. I had a massive crush on him because he was so different from others around which I feel even today. The more I went away from him, I was attracted and in love with him even more. In fact, I had decided that if at all we couldn’t marry, I wouldn’t marry at all. It was difficult for me to accept anyone else as a life partner.
But God fulfilled our wishes, we remained in love and after I completed my studies, he once again asked me if I was sure of my feelings for him and wanted to settle down with him to which I was more than happy. We got married despite initial opposition from our families. However, everything fell into place after marriage from both sides of our families and we settled down happily. Marriage was another roller coaster initially because of the way we were brought up and also due to financial constraints. But we braced it all with our love. Patience and belief in each other were the key factors which forged our relationship.
Love is that power you give to someone who brings out the best in you, who values you and is ready to do anything for you. I learnt at that point that love is restraint, self-control, belief in each other and the willingness to fight the world for the wellbeing and happiness of the person you love. Sometimes it’s also a fight with yourself. Through all the practicalities of life, through which we have fought for each other, sometimes with each other, we have been granted this blessing in abundance of love. We have grown into each other so much that it’s difficult to see us differently. Through the years this journey of love has been full of romance, dependency, friendship and togetherness and I have seen many shades of love in this one relationship which has made me complete and happy. I am a very independent and strong-willed person but with him you will find me different because he is that part of my mind that loves and cares. I am that part of him which is protective and strong. We are happier together.
The day I realised that I cannot live without him I decided I will live with him and for him. Now with a family of our own, it’s about Us…neither him nor me…
Dedicated to our love and to all those in love❤️
©®Archana Sadashiv Wagle, 2021